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delirium happy

Just keep on trying till you run out of cake

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And the long-delayed answers
delirium happy
I knew I'd get there in the end. The answers to the last few "ask me anything" questions from a little while ago.

mortaine -- What is your favorite color? Or, three favorites, if you're like me and can't decide....

Depending on mood either black, purple, or chestnutty, coppery type of orangey browns.

jpallan -- What question do you never want to be asked again for the rest of your life?

That's tricky. The "again" indicates that it has to be something that I've been asked in the past, and there aren't really very many questions that I've been asked tyhat I'd want to avoid. My initial temptation is to go for something like "What was the symbolism in the boxes chosen by Portia's suitors in The Merchant of Venice?" (GCSE English literature), or anything at all concerning the Tennessee Valley Authority (GCSE geography). After a spot of deliberation and a flash of insight, I'm going to go with "Why weren't you at church on Sunday?" which was a common question back when I was a weeling attending a Catholic primary school. Should I ever become a part of a religious congregation again, I would hate to discover that it was one that would try to shame me if I didn't attend a service every week, on a given day.

beginning -- You're being chased by a bear. You run down an alley, thinking you will escape, but there's a wall you can't get over. You are trapped. All you have in your pockets are a plastic spoon, a roll of tape, and a crayon. How do you defend yourself?

Well, clearly this depends on the species of bear and the colour of the crayon. Defending myself from a polar bear with an orange crayon would be a totally different kettle of fish to defending myself from a sun bear with a black crayon. However, drawing on the lowest common denominator of my escape plans, they'd have to go something like this:

First off, I would draw a human outline on the wall with the crayon. Upon rounding the corner, the bear would see this and be confused for a brief second. I would then assemble a rudimentary catapult using the plastic spoon and the hair elastic I would be wearing at the time. While the bear was confused, I would use the catapult to fire the crayon at the bear, hitting it between the ear, and stunning it. while it was stunned, I would race up to it and bind its limbs with the tape. This would then give me ample time to escape and contact a local zoo to come and collect the bear.

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A baby was spontaneously created within me as I read that. I love you.

Ooooh! I love your bear chase solution!

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