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delirium happy

Just keep on trying till you run out of cake

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Misc and sundry, sundry and misc
delirium happy
Having completely broken my sleep patterns the other day to escape from hormone hell, I'm quite amazed to see how much the messed up sleep patterns have caused my mood to dip. Or at least, I think that's the cause, though standard disclaimer, etc. Getting my sleep patterns into some semblance of order has been one of the things I've been working on a lot in therapy, and I think that it has been helping me. Having something akin to set hours definitely does help to get things done, and just sleeping the day away has led me very quickly back into mopy drifty territory.

I've had quite enough of that, though, so I'm making today a productive day. And when I say "productive" I don't necessarily mean hugely so, but I just mean doing things rather than rationalising reasons not to, and doing something rather than doing nothing. I only decided this after getting out of bed (for something like the third time today!) about an hour ago, and already I'm feeling much better in myself; more positive, and more lively.

First off, I managed to send a thank you that I'd been meaning to send for a week or so but procrastinated. I feel better for having done this. With things like that, there's always a part of me that dreads having to say "yeah, I should have done this sooner, sorry" so I put it off longer, and the problem just grows. Was a remarkably simple and easy thing to do, though.

Next up, I decided it was time to search for a hairdresser's. As I've mentioned before, it's been something like 5 years since I had my hair cut by someone who wasn't me, and something like 10 years since I had my hair cut by someone who wasn't me without having a friend along with me for moral support. It is very much in need of cutting, but it is something of a terrifying prospect for me. Of course, sitting and waiting isn't likely to make it any less terrifying.

I had spoken about this with the person who zapped me with lasers and with my therapist over the past week, so I had a couple of leads to follow up. (What do you call someone who zaps you with lasers anyway? Laserist? Nurse? Beautician? Maybe I should just stick with "Charlotte".)

Charlotte is familiar with an organisation called The Northern Concord, which is a transgender group for the north of England. She said that she thought they had a web forum, and that might be a good place to look and ask "hey, anyone know any hair salons in Lancaster that don't suck?" This seemed like a reasonable idea, so I googled their website to see if I could find any forums. I couldn't see any sign of anything forum-looking though, and their site is pretty dire, so that particular line of enquiry was a bust.

Next up, there was the lead my therapist had given me. He had said that there was one salon in Lancaster that generally had a reputation for being the best and the friendliest (though also the most expensive, naturally) and told me their name and location. While I couldn't remember the name, I could remember that it was of the form "$name1 and $name2" and that it was opposite the back entrance of Boots. A quick google later, and I find that they are Jo and Cass and I have a website and a phone number for them.

I may phone them up tomorrow, depending on when I happen to be awake and whether I'm feeling brave or not. But even if I don't manage to get that done tomorrow, I'm still one step further forwards than I was this time yesterday. That said, though, if anyone has encouragement or advice to try to get me to actually be useful or productive then that wouldn't go amiss.

After that I moved onto catching up on Facebook Scrabble. This is hardly productive in any usual sense of the word, but is considerably better than blankly staring into space. If I've been playing Scrabble with you then it's currently your move. :)

After that came the writing of this LJ entry, and after I've finished writing this I think that I may do a spot of tidying in here, which is really badly needed. I'm sure that a brief frenzied attack will have it looking a whole lot better, though.

Before I go off to do that, though, I have a question: Does anyone actually care about any of the entries I've been making recently? There's been a distinct lack of comments, which has made me paranoid that I'm boring the pants off everyone. Of course, I don't expect people to comment on everything, because a lot of the time when I'll read things I'll think "oh, that's nifty" but not have anything to say. Without feedback though, it's difficult to distinguish between that and "why are you infesting my friends page with such tripe?" and I'm particularly talented at paranoia, so wouldn't mind a little bit of reassurance.

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I've found many of your recent entries supremely fascinating, and have been reading them relatively 'religiously', which I suppose I'm just using to mean "When I scroll down my friends page, I always scroll back specifically to read rho's entries". That likely sounds sarcastic, but it's really not.

I've been enjoying reading your entries. They haven't been boring in the least.

I care, and I find it fascinating to read most of your stuff (the maths can go over my head :D).

I am interested, but don't generally comment unless I have something useful to say, and I definitely don't have anything useful to say here right now.

Except you should merge your dr curits and dr curtis tags.

I always read, but I've felt very disconnected from a good 70% of my friend list lately for the very same reasons, and don't think anything I have to say would be noticed.

Your life interests me, but I can't think of anything worth saying. -hug-

I always read even if I don't comment. I tend not to comment for the sake of it unless I have something useful to say/add/suggest. I find myself saying things like "oh I know how that feels" especially around anxiety over hairdressers and insomnia which sneaks in and sucks the life out of me. So no, you're not boring me and I am reading the posts.

I'm also pretty talented at paranoia.

I am reading, and finding them an interesting and valuable perspective on a world that is not my own and never will be, but I love hearing about it and trying to understand.

I do read your posts, and I find them interesting. Thinking of it, I thought, that it would be sad, if you stopped posting them. I do not comment, as I don't have anything clever to say. :)

*goes to look for some scrabble details* We did play scrabble by email before, if I recall correctly.

What do you call someone who zaps you with lasers anyway?

Anything they want you to call them.

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I'm dead exhausted. It's been the most godawfullest school term I've yet had: I'm teaching way too much; I started the semester with a broken wrist; and oh yes, I moved out and sued for divorce in the middle of it. I have no brain left and must recharge it at term break. Not to mention I don't know anyplace to get one's hair cut, be it transfriendly or trans-hostile, in the whole of the UK.

However, add me -- Gwyn McVay -- and I'll Facebook Scrabble you, in lieu of having anything actually bright to say. SOWPODS, even, in deference to your European-icity.

So far, you have yet to write anything that I've found boring/skimmed past.

I'm interested in reading what you write, whether it be transgender stuff or math things that make my head go boom or simple little observations about life. Keep writing. Keep posting. Please.

I read what you write. I don't always comment, this is true for most things I read on LJ actually. I think a lot of us think that nobody is reading our entries if there are no replies. I think it'd be nice to see how many people have read the post rather than relying on getting feedback.

Paranoid? It's a big club we're in.

I'm convinced nobody reads my entries either - but they do it seems.

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I'm here, keeping tabs on you, and lurking as ever.. I hope we'll talk again soon *hugs*

I've read most of your recent entries with interest, but didn't have anything specific to say in response.

Also, I'm vaguely paranoid that you might not want feedback from non-friends (aka "intruding lurkers"), though if that were true you'd likely post more friends-only.

I like reading your entries, but I am awful at commenting.

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