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delirium happy

Just keep on trying till you run out of cake

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delirium happy
I think I want a parrot.

See, yesterday, I was having One Of Those Days. After a particularly stubborn loaf of bread reduced me to an invective of obscenities as I attempted to make a sandwich, I was talking to phoenixdreaming and informed her of this fact. Actually, I informed her that my precise words were, if memory serves, "fucking fucking sodding bastard fucking bread" (not I think you'll agree, the words of someone having a good day). This amused her, and she informed me that I need to get a parrot so I can teach it to swear in my (apparently) charming English manner.

It wasn't a serious suggestion, but the more I think about it, the more it seems like a good idea. I've never had a pet before, but I've often thought it might be something that could do me a lot of good. For a hermit like me, the companionship would probably be very helpful, and I think it would also do me good to have someone else reliant on me, to stop me from moping for days on end, as I am occasionally wont to do. The thing that has stopped me, though, is that I've never thought of an animal that I thought would sufficiently hold my interest, and I think it would be cruel to have a pet if I wasn't going to be a good companion for it.

Parrots, though? Parrots are different. Parrots are cool. African Greys, especially, are awesome. What can I say? I've always had a thing for smart birds. I think I may start looking up info on pet parrots.

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My family 'adopted' a cockatoo when I was very, very young. He had the sort of vocabulary that'd make even the saltiest sailor blush. And he was bald, save for the feathers on his head that he couldn't reach and pluck himself.

Anxiety in a bird is a very ugly thing, when they pluck their own feathers out until they're bald as a store-bought chicken. More disconcerting yet, he had this creepy habit of sneaking into a shower with you.

His tenure with us was short-lived, when I started parroting the parrot.

Parrots are obnoxious creatures that require lots of care. Can you promise to clean its cage, or feed it? Even when you're too overwhelmed or meh to leave the house to buy litter or bird food?

Parrots are very smart, have very long lifespans, and need a lot of space and stimulis. A parrot is a fairly big commitment, because unless you get a fairly old one, you'll have one for a long time, and they need to have enough to do or it's cruel. However, they are very smart for animals and quite fascinating.

You might want to consider one of the other smart birds that, while not quite as smart as a parrot, are quite smart and a little easier to care for. If you want information or suggestions, I have a friend who is very knowledgeable about birds and has two, one is I think a conure and the other is a hybrid or somesuch... unfortunately, I am not knowledgeable about birds.

My lothario wants a budgie though. Actually, he'd like a cat, but I'm allergic to cats, and he wants to have a budgie if he can't have a cat. We'll see if we ever get one, but we might at some point.

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Especially if you're shopping in Melton Mowbray.

Rats are very intelligent, and if you get 2 of them you don't need to get them out of the cage for hours on end everyday - ours come out for 30 minutes to 1 hour every night and play - like a dog will play - with us. Parrots are a huge commitment - lifespan of around 20 years and need as much, if not more, attention as a toddler does.

'E's just resting!

I know a dead parrot when I see one!

Talk to gynocide — she can tell you all about it. Tell her I sent you. :)

If you do get a parrot, be careful to ensure that it doesn't sign up for an account with BT.

Ravens can learn to talk.

Not that I'm suggesting anything. ;)~

I would consider adopting an older Grey from a rescue, though, if you do decide to go that route. Or else pulling an heir out of your hat. Obviously you've probably worked out that part already, but I wanted to mention it to give me a springboard for saying the following: I categorically refuse to be named anyone's parrot heir! Their beaks terrify me and I'm planning to die before every parrot owner I know anyway!

I feel better now. :)

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